Why has Page 3 ever been ok?

What on earth was Rupert Murdoch thinking when he said to his news team “I know what’ll go down well with a vague and pointless caption about the state of political Hull. Tits.”

Even more pressingly, why in the name of the sweet divine boobie was this idea not condemned outright by all women – if not by just plain everyone – across the whole world? How did it ever become ok to gawk at a pair of knockers while taking in some loose form of news?

No more page 3 tshirt

Don’t get me wrong, I am really appreciative of my “ladies”. Proud, and pleased – if you’ve read my Ruby Off The Rails column, you’ll see I’m not actually averse to getting them out for people (albeit through a layer of glitter). But let me be clear that this is on my terms alone, and not on a platform where my body is cheapened, my feminine pride a joke and where I’m not a slave to the attention of a public who are clearly ok with the countdown-style anticipation of an underage models’ sixteenth birthday. The way Page 3 is looked upon and treated by society is despicable, luring many into the idea that they should participate in this scummy perversion to be attractive, and many more into being perceived as the lesser sex because our female peers have chosen to take a step that puts girls in a vulnerable position.

Someone finally stood up and said something, and that someone is Lucy Holmes, founder of the No More Page 3 campaign.

Lucy is an actress and writer – though clearly has now turned her fair hand to the side of the lady activist. As she told Stylist magazine this week, she started the campaign after a (thoroughly justified) shake up when she saw Jessica Ennis’ Olympic triumph being overshadowed by a wanton honey wearing her pants and a smile.

Lucy is my idea of a modern day heroine. Women have many fights to fight in a modern age where old fashioned ideals go head to head with having to draw a line between sexual freedom and sluttiness. It’s hard to know what to think at the best of times, but when we have widespread so-called family-orientated media slapping offensive imagery into news stories… something is wrong. It’s wrong because it sets a terrible example for females who are prescribed role models to live by, and  wrong because it makes real women comparable to materialism in the eyes of men. In one deft swoop, Page 3 has made an entire gender vulnerable, and it’s sickening.

No more Page 3

If the general idea in Western society is that men and women are to be seen as equals, I’d either like to see Page 3 gone, or I’d like to see barenaked penis in the media I consume. That’s right. Please put an erection right there in the middle of my monthly Company magazine, preferably between Jameela Jamil’s column and the Rimmel advert. I wonder how many men dread the thought that a simple magazine could give us a visual comparison of penis sizes if all things really were equal. And I wonder how many people who have been desensitised to Page 3 girls are grimacing at the thought of readily available cock pictures.

The one downside to getting rid of Page 3? It’ll take away stage one of my “boyfriend test”. ‘Cause let me tell you: I categorically refuse to touch any man who leers at the chest of a barely-legal with a bargepole. Those men, in my eyes, are a drain on their own gender.

Ten things you can do to support the No More Page 3 campaign:

1. Sign the petition

2. Join the Facebook group
To keep up to speed with all the really really rather cunning campaign ideas.

3. Share the petition with your friends
By email, Facebook, Twitter, carrier pigeon. And then share it, share it, and share it some more. This petition needs to reach people if it’s going to have an impact. So please release it and let it fly to the corners of our beautiful land.

4. Talk about the issue
To your friends, family, talk about it at the pub, at the hairdressers, in the office, at zumba, on the bus, while you’re getting changed for football, when you’re giving birt,…let’s get talking. Some young women have been saying to us, ‘oh, we’ve never thought about it before’ and we feel that’s a bit sad. Because when the largest picture of a woman in the most widely read paper in Britain is that of a young woman showing her bare boobs everyday, the message it says is ‘just shut up, girls, and get your tops off for the boys’.

5. Don’t buy The Sun
You can buy it again when they take the bare boobs out, which won’t be long, we promise.

6. Don’t click on The Sun’s website
We’re pretty sure they get pay per click advertising..so nooooooo!!!

7. Prepare for the boycott
Yes, a boycott, what fun! Because we think that Dominic Mohan will start paying a bit more attention to the way his newspaper conditions people to view women as sex objects when we boycott his major advertisers. So, for one week, the last week in October, 29th Oct – 4th Nov you should avoid Tesco, Morrison, Sainsbury’s, Asda…yes, we know that these are the 4 main supermarkets who along with Murdoch control our country, but we think it’s doable. Do a weekly shop on the Sunday and stock up again after the boycott. Perhaps sampling the delights of Lidl, Iceland, Waitrose, or an independent grocer if stuck in between. There are some others, O2, Vodaphone, but we acknowledge they might be tricky, and oh, and you’ll never believe this one, BSkyB..so if you were thinking of cancelling your Sky do it in that week. Mwah ha ha.

8. Come and be in our campaign song video
Oh yes, we couldn’t do a campaign without a song. Join them in a London Park TBC on a date TBC. Think of it as a modern day march, but without the marching…more sitting, chatting, eating a picnic, discussing how we can make society a kinder place for our daughters and sons and each other, with a few jazz hands for the camera.

9. Buy a T-shirt
Wear it with pride, take a photo of yourself in it, perhaps in a position of interest ‘look I’m in Blackpool’ ‘ah ha, here I am in Lidl’ ‘here I am on the loo’ and use it as your facebook profile picture, dress your friends up in it and insist that they do the same. They’re £9 +pp and all the profits go towards breast cancer clinical research trials at The Princess Alexandra Hospital Charitable Trust – Breast Trials Unit, the research there helps the whole country and it’s where they treated Lucy’s amazing sister in law. Just email nomorepage3@gmail.com and we’ll tell you what to do.


Join our tribe

We promise to pop a whole host of good stuff into your inbox every Wednesday to brighten up your week. Can't say fairer than that now can we?

Thank you for subscribing.

Something went wrong.