We’re almost at the finish line. I will be getting married in just four weeks, so it’s all ramping up around here. There are boxes of jam jars and candles littering my house, and people are chasing me for money (help). Planning a wedding is not really what I expected at all; in the movies it’s all binders stuffed with magazine cut outs and drinking champagne and fights with your mother-in-law. Other than a few glasses of Prosecco here and there, that was really not my experience. Here’s what’s actually going to happen:
1. Everyone will try to take all your money
Weddings are ridiculously expensive and, try as you might, you will end up spending pretty much your entire savings on one day. When I imagine how many Mulberry handbags I could have instead, I shed a little tear. Planning a wedding is more expensive than we imagined, and than we budgeted for – which is pretty much the experience of everyone I’ve spoken to. We’re about 25% over what we expected to spend, because there are so many little things to factor in that you just don’t think about in the beginning. Just be prepared for that, but also fight your corner and try these tips for having a budget wedding.
2. You have way more free time than you think
From the scare-mongering that goes on, I went into wedding planning thinking that it would take up every weekend and spare moment from now until the end of time. Nope. Wedding planning, like all things, takes up the time you give it. If you want to spend days agonising over flower arrangements and visiting every venue in the county just to be sure you’ve found The One, then by all means knock yourself out. You really don’t have to, though. Do your research, make a firm decision and move on so you can get back to watching The Good Wife.
3. The wedding is not the most important thing in your life
My wedding is important to me, sure. But it’s not the most important thing I’ve got going on. It’s just one of them. My job. My blog. My hobbies. My family. My friends. My pre-husband. My cat. All more important than The Wedding.
4. Your wedding is not all about you
The phrase I have heard most over the past year is ‘It’s your wedding, so you can do what you want’. Yes, it is my wedding. No, I can’t do what I want. (But I will cry if I want to). There are so many people to factor in, to consider, if you don’t want to be an asshole bride (and I know you don’t). I have invited everyone that I love most in the world to my wedding, and I care about them – I want them to have the best time possible so that has to be a factor when making decisions.
5. Everyone has to deal with family politics
If you’re lucky like me, then that family drama will be minimal. A little bit of a headache over the seating plan and hopefully you’ll be done. If you’re slightly more unlucky, the drama could range from overbearing family members trying to stick their oar in to full-blown fist fights at the wedding. Just know that everyone has to deal with the drama in some form or another – you are not alone.
6. You’ll remember why you’re doing this whole thing in the first place
Planning a wedding has made me more sure than ever that I want Paul to be my husband. He has handled all the logistics for the whole thing, called all the suppliers and kept a track of all the money. He has been supportive and practical and all round pretty ace. Obviously, your reasons will be different to mine but chances are, as you plan your wedding together, you’ll be reminded of why you are getting married in the first place. *cue soppy music*
Tying the knot? Check out our wedding section for the help you could wish for.
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