I haven’t exactly got a great track record when it comes to things of the heart. I go on dates with the wrong men, embarrass myself regularly and stay in bad relationships for far too long, something I’m sure everyone has been guilty of at some point.
But now that I’m in a happy relationship it’s making me reflect on the reasons I might have had such terrible luck with men, and part of me knows it’s because of my stupid decisions on previous dates.
Here are the worst things I’ve ever done on a date that you should avoid doing at all costs.
Note: Please laugh at these. I write this with a smile on my face and plenty of lessons learnt. Do not pity me, for these lessons led me to my wonderful fella so it all worked out for the best – honest.
1. Get drunk…a lot
This is a mistake I made on a regular basis and it never ended well. I got so nervous I forgot my alcohol tolerance is about a single glass of wines worth and often proceeded to drink cocktails, mix wines, and on more than one occasion, down shots.
This led me to fall off stools, swear like a sailor and sing “Don’t You Want Me” very close to a random man’s face.
Funnily enough only one drunk date ever led to a second one.
2. Force him to kiss you
This wasn’t technically on a date, but after he’d dumped me. He dumped me, we went on the same train and when we said goodbye I grabbed his face and made him kiss me. To his credit he didn’t pull away, but given that it happened on the underground, I had a lot of weird looks given to me all the way home. Well done me.
3. Mention the Ex
Everyone has those rebound dates where you know you shouldn’t be there, you know that you aren’t over them but you convince yourself you’re ready.
On this particular date it transpired my ex’s new girlfriend worked for my date. So I proceeded to talk about him, her, and then cry. Whilst in bed with him. Smooth moves.
I never heard from him again
4. Go past where the Ex works
The date was going well, we’d held hands, had a cheeky snog under a bridge and it felt like I was in a romcom. It was perfect.
Until I realised we were walking very close to where my recent ex worked and it was around the time he’d be finishing work. He then tried to kiss me, I stopped him, explained why, he assumed I wasn’t over him and never saw me again. FML.
5. Kiss them in front of my flatmates
My first ever date at university went relatively well (well, considering it was me). He walked me to my front door of my student house and kissed me.
Sadly my housemates knew I was on a date, saw him walk me to the door and so decided to wear gasmasks (don’t ask me why they had them to hand), grabbed the sword they’d recently bought (no I’m not making this up, I had weird flatmates) and proceeded to stare at my new man intensely.
To his credit he dated me for a month, but to this day he’s never forgotten it. Always good to scar someone for life…
6. Make them watch David Tennant
The best/worst thing I ever did on a date I still can’t believe I did.
I was on a date with a guy when I realised that David Tennant’s new show was on that night. I like the Tennant, a lot, and this was before iPlayer so I only had one opportunity to watch it. So did I end the date? Did I just accept the fact I’d miss the show? Nope, I told him to come home with me, watch the show, and then we’d continue drinks afterwards at the pub where we’d just been.
What’s the worst thing you’ve ever done on a date?
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