I’ve never really gone to the gym. It’s just never appealed to me. I tried it a couple of times in the past, but I could never get myself to sign up – it felt like too much of a commitment to something I kind of hated the thought of. And here’s why:
1. You can exercise elsewhere
If I went to the gym I’d probably end up running on the treadmill, going on the exercise bike and doing a little circuit on a mat. With a pair of trainers, a bike and some DIY weights (it can be done!), you can do the first two outside and the latter at home. Circuits at home are actually really fun.
2. You can spend your gym membership fee on all the Nike gear
Imagine being able to spend up to £50 a month on all the jazzy leggings.
3. No awkward encounters
Whether it’s colleagues, acquaintances or someone you once fancied, no one wants to run into anyone when they’re bright red and shiny and it smells of bodily fluids everywhere, which brings me to my next point…
4. No bodily fluids
I’m always amazed at how comfortable people are at gyms, sharing bodily fluids with anyone and everyone around themselves. You know, you’re on the treadmill and right next to you is a guy who quickly turns his head and a bit of his sweat lands on your cheek. New levels of gross.
5. There are gyms in parks
OK, you might not want to be doing serious workouts next to people drinking and smoking, but if you go to the park early enough in the morning (but late enough in the summer for everyone having gone to bed), you can enjoy some outdoor gym equipment on your own.
6. No creeps
How often do you actually hear of anyone meeting at the gym? In real life, the phrase “there’s this guy at my gym” is usually followed by “who’s really fucking creepy”. The hot guys at the gym only exist in films, honestly.
7. No naked strangers
The chances of seeing random strangers fully naked in a really sweaty room drops dramatically. Or, you know, it depends what you do on your free time.
8. No mirrors
Seriously, who decided gyms had to have mirrors? Who wants to look at themselves exercising? Creepy guys, that’s who.
Do you hate the gym too? Tell us why in the comments below!
Join our tribe
We promise to pop a whole host of good stuff into your inbox every Wednesday to brighten up your week. Can't say fairer than that now can we?